You can help by adding missing items with reliable sources.
This story is part of the “I” Stories series produced by the Gender Links Opinion and Commentary Service for the Sixteen Days of Activism on Gender Violence.This is a dynamic list and may never be able to satisfy particular standards for completeness. On the contrary the baby is his as well and he must be able to care for her and I sincerely hope that once he gets out of prison he will at least give some financial help so that the baby can have a good quality of life. If my father wants to see his daughter I will not refuse. I want my daughter to live a normal life. My nani has agreed to look after my baby so that I can undergo some kind of training to allow me to get a job. My uncle told me that he has bought a piece of land for me. I am sincerely planning to go and live with my “nani” (grandmother). I have been told that once I turn 18 my case will go to court and I will most probably be able to live on my own if I so wish. Who knows may be one day when I go out of the shelter I will able to start a new life. My sadness is that I would love to follow a class in theatre but cannot as I have to take care of my baby. Seeing my plants flourishing gave me great pleasure. I enjoy gardening and last year I got a little plot of land in the garden of the shelter and planted some herbs. I find other things to do while the others go for yoga or theatre classes. I am positive about myself and count my blessings that my life is not completely ruined. They are even prepared to look after my baby so that I can participate in one or two events but I cannot go out for training, for example.
My mentors are very caring and they have taught me how to look after my baby. I am very happy at the shelter with my beautiful little girl but unfortunately I cannot participate in the activities of the shelter as I have to look after my baby. I was told that my father went to prison because he should not have had sex with me. After the hospital instead of returning home I was sent to the shelter with my baby. I stayed in hospital for a few days and at the same time the Child Protection Unit did an enquiry. The Doctor confirmed that I was six months pregnant. She immediately told my mother and my uncle accompanied us to the doctor. We were both horrified to learn that indeed there was something inside me. She insisted that she saw something and came closer to me to touch my stomach.
I was taken aback and said there was nothing under my dress. I started to question her and she said that she saw that something inside me turning around. But one day while I was cleaning the house I could feel my cousin staring at me. He was not violent and has never taken off my clothes by force. Maybe I thought it was normal because he was my father. I cannot explain why I accepted and why he did it. Soon after this terrible experience my father started to have sex with me. I did not tell anybody about my traumatic experience. To my surprise, he did not take me to the shop but to a bush nearby and he raped me there. I met him a couple of times and one day he asked me to accompany him to the shop. In fact a neighbour told me he was madly in love with me. I don’t know if I accepted because I was not a virgin.
I really cannot explain how it all started but there was no violence and he did not force me.
I was only nine years old when my father started having sex with me.